My starting weight was a ginormous (for me) 175.5 lbs. That’s a whopping 12st7.5 lbs. My goal? Eventually I’d like to get back down to my fighting weight of 8st13 lbs (125 lbs), which was my weight at my absolute healthiest.  I was living at home with my mum and dad the year after I left that dreadful boarding school.

I am 5’3” and big in the chest department, I do realise I will never be 100 lbs and a skinny-minnie. I know how I want my body to be, and I know this because I’ve done it before.

Ok, so it is now over a decade later, but I have every intention of getting there. There’s 50.5 lbs to be lost from my starting weight and I’ve lost 7.5 lbs since then. That’s only 43.5 lbs to go. Ah hell, that’s only the weight of my dog!



1. 165 lbs: new handbag
I don’t mean some wee purse from Topshop. I’ve got my eye on a few contenders here, including a very special Mulberry classic or something from Chloe or Chanel. I’ve got another few pounds to go before a trip to Harvey Nicks will be in the cards!

2. 150 lbs: mini shopping spree
I can’t go around in clothes that are too big for me, can I?

3. 140 lbs: tattoo
I’ve wanted a particular illustration of Alice falling through the rabbit hole ever since I first laid eyes on it 6 years ago. It’s by an artist named Iassen Ghuislev, and it is the most beautiful illustration of my favourite book of all time. I need to find a bare spot to put it, but methinks this could become part of my half sleeve.

The last time I was tattooed by this particular artist, I was 140 lbs. And that is the weight I will be when I go back.

Whilst I’m there I have a couple NIN-inspired ideas I’d like to incorporate; song lyrics mostly. I’ve always loved both “Hurt” and “The only time”, and I think lyrics from both sngs would go quite nicely with my Alice tattoo.

From “Hurt”
“Beneath the stains of time/the feelings disappear/you are someone else/I am still right here”
“If I could start again/a million miles away/I will keep myself/I will find a way”

From “The only time”
“Lay my hands on Heaven and the sun and the moon and the stars”.
“I swear/I just found everything i need./the sweat in your eyes the blood in your veins are listening to me”.

4. 130 lbs: NYC
I haven’t seen one of my best friends in a couple years; she lives in NYC and the last time I saw her was the last time I went to visit her there. We had a total blast – this girl is the only person I know who can outshop me, and she is also the only flatmate I have ever had that I never wanted to throttle at some point.

I miss her, and I’d love to go and see her.

5. 125 lbs: shop for a new wardrobe
Oh yes, when I hit my goal weight of 125 lbs, I will be going on a massive shopping spree. I plan to kit out an entirely new wardrobe of clothing, and I will be selling off my “big girl clothes” on ebay.


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